Friday, June 30, 2006
well well. i finally decided to get a personal blog. just to post things that have to be censored in the other or things that i hide from the rest of the world. even my parents. got the idea from jiejie. it should be more sensible than the other one, because there im just ranting non-stop. and maybe make things seem sadder/happier than it is. its time i let it all out to at least a few people i can trust, because bottling things inside doesnt seem to work for me.
so i guess i never really treasured them the times when i was still sitting with the bunch of them. all 7 of them. and now when we have to change seats, and im so isolated from all of them except for the aisle separating me and pornster [no names here]. i realise i need them and miss them so much. thanks guys for just being there for me all the time.
still, i cant believe i got scolded by beanie for that. i seriously meant every word i said. why cant she see that? i cant afford to let my grades slip. its so borderline and i cant afford to deprove. without the few people who sit beside me, how am i supposed to get through term 3? i dont wanna flunk.
another reason for this blog: i dont want people to think im a mugger. yeah i dont know why, its just my reputation not to be a studious freak. but i think thanks to the 2 of them and a few others, im turning into one. not that its a bad thing, but as i said, a reputation's at stake.
ohwell, i guess its just me. like ****** said, i have to learn to survive without friends. but i doubt i can do it. im the kind who can never ever live without friends around, without people i know i can trust, and without anyone to lean on.
took me a long time to decide whether to post this something else, but i decided to do it another time. i just cant put down my pride to really let every secret of me out. but i'll try, and one day i shall succeed. afterall, either i tell or it bursts. either way they'll come out.
COLOUR
my world @ 1:01 PM
